[Dave]

Dooce vs. Jason Calacanis

She of the "I got fired because of my blog" fame versus the man of a million blogs. It's just like every time you ever asked, Who would win: Wolverine or the Hulk? Bear or Shark? Amoeba or Paramecium? Thin Oprah or Fat Oprah?

Celebrity Editon of Blog Thunderdome has begun.

Let me briefly add the following facts:

• Unlike all previous battles, neither of these two 'volunteered' for this. I emailed them as a courtesy, but they did not respond.
  
• This is not an attempt to siphon fame off two interweb stars. If you recall, how many hit counters do I have on my site? That's right, zero. I just figured this would be a fun change of pace.
  
• I bought a thing of Keebler Fudge Stripe cookies the other day. It was delicious.
  
• You, the reader, will decide the loser's punishment. See here. Heck, you're probably going to have to help enforce it too.

Enjoy.

[trishag]

Any word from either contestant yet?

[The Corporal]

It's too bad there isn't some kind of magic button that would just delete that shit from the internet completely.

Dooce should be changed to "douche". Jesus H Christ... She thinks that cray-on is pronounced crown? And the post about her sucky developmental stage?

She may be Heather B. Armstrong, but I'm Fucking A. Bored.

As for Calacockis, everything on his page is like a fucking SPAM nightmare. I'm sure I've seen everything on his page in my Inbox. I look at it, and want to stab my eyes with crowns. (Oh wait, it's "cray-ons").

If I wanted to know his fucking schedule, I'd call him up and ask him. I'd say, "Hey Jason, who are you spamming today? What are you doing when that's done? And after that? Oh... I see. Hey, that's a nice ad for dontpassgas.org... Are they talking about farts?"

But then, he may not answer, because he is SOOOOO busy. He must be. It looks like he's trying to type faster than a Tijuana crack whore itching for a fix.

Quote

if I’m schedule for an event with you and it’s NOT on this list ping me ASAP so I don’t miss it! jason at calacanis dot com is my emai.

Slow it down, shitwad. You're leaving out letters!

I vote for Dooce. She's the lesser of two horrible evils.

[Dave]

Trisha: Nope.

Quote

some kind of magic button that would just delete that shit from the internet completely.

Corporal: I have a full cadre of top interweb scientists working on just this issue.

[Deb]

Hey no fair. You said I was only banned for 2 months!

[Zach]

After reading Calacanis' blog, I can think of no punishment more fitting than the plain old two months of bannage, other than perhaps an eternity trapped in limbo. I read three lines and I have no idea what is going on anymore. It is like a cacophony of pigs squealing while they feast upon my eyes. I'm sorry I ever looked at it. It will give me nightmares for the rest of my tortured life.

[CrazyLikeAFox]

I took a gander at Jason Calacanis' blog and I have decided that I have been wasting too much time writing actual posts. I should have just posted my calendar and schedule on my blog so the whole world can see who I take meetings with. Yawn.

Dooce. Is this just the mother of all mommy blogs or what? How fortunate for her that she got fired, otherwise, no one would venture a second visit to her blog. How I wish I could leave her a comment and tell her that I really don't give a damn what camera she takes pictures with everyday.

But if I must hate one more than the other, I would have to hate Calacanis more. Just because I'm a mommy.

[Deb]

I hate Dooce because I can't tell her how much I hate her.

[Dave]

Verdict is up in the Blog Thunderdome.